In celebration 🎉 of Journey #2’s trip for Medical clearance next week…

Ask me ANYTHING about Surrogacy!

There’s no question too personal, and nothing outside the realm of what I will answer.

• I want to know what YOU want to know.

• I want to spread awareness & information.

• I want to answer your questions & possibly help you get started on a journey if you would like.

• Ever wondered but didn’t want to pry… Ask away… I’ll answer…

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• Why did I choose to become surrogate?

• Do we get paid?

• Is the baby genetically related to me?

• How could I ‘give’ it up?

• Did I know the intended parents before matching with them?

• Do I have to travel?

Nothing is too personal, so please, ask away.

From Facebook, Kari asks,

Is it emotionally difficult to give up baby to their parents after birth?

Do you breastfeed at all?

How do you feel surrogacy affects/differs in postpartum?

Good questions Kari!

Is it emotionally difficult to give up baby to their parents after birth?

As far as for me, it is one of the best feelings ever to watch the IPs (intended parents) meet their lil one for the first time and to help them establish that bond. To see the joy of not just a new life brought into this world but a new family being born. When they go home. It’s like the completion of an amazing journey. A fulfillment that can’t be measured.

We fostered for years and as Shay says when anybody ask her about it, “We are just babysitting the lil one for a few months until they meet up with their parents. The only difference is the lil one is inside mommy’s tummy instead of out and about here at the time. “

As far as the saying “give the baby up” I feel it’s not giving the baby up when in reality they were not mine to begin with. To me it feels similar to when I help a family though midwifery or fostering. It’s just on such an even more fulfilling and deeper level.

As far as my own kids reaction to the process they were excited. All 3 kids we have here at home were all totally fine with it. I was open about the process and clear I was just helping the baby grow so his parents could have him. They were all bigger kids at the time of delivery. They were, 14, 12, &10. They did researched on the whole process. It was very educational for them. We are open and honest with them about it all. They did get to meet him afterwards and thought he was the cutest. There are also some books to help explain it to kids. Mine were old enough and felt like it was totally a awesome thing to do. They were very understanding and compassionate.

With my previous journey we still keep in touch. Not only did their family grow but so did ours. Our two families will forever be bonded. We all formed not just amazing lasting friendships through the process but became like family. However, each case and person is different. Some IPs and surrogates may not want that kind of connection afterwards. Communication is discussed during matching. That way all parties are comfortable and their personalities mesh well. Everyone is on the same page as far as expectations and needs.

Do you breastfeed at all?

It really depends on the IPs and the surrogate. Every situation is different. If they decide to breastfeed the surrogate is paid and packaging and shipping is covered.

I didn’t get to with my last journey. They were out of country, with out of country shipping, IP decided not to go that direction. They were only here a very short time before heading back home.

Each journey is different. We haven’t discussed it yet for this next journey. I like to discuss it as if I would with a midwifery client. I lay out all the facts and then it’s up to them. They have that choice. I feel like it’s their path to evaluate the facts and make an informed decision based on their life and knowledge. I feel that just like I make the decision to breastfeed with my kids, its their right just like it was mine with my kids, to decide for themselves and their family.

How do you feel surrogacy affects/differs in postpartum?

As far as the effects on my body with the group decision of not breastfeeding, It was different. With us not breastfeeding 🤱 I didn’t have that immediate connection afterward. That golden hour for baby and my body. My body didn’t understand for the first little bit. Even though my mind knew and was ok with it. My mind understood it was not just my decision alone. It took my body a week or so to make that connection.

After that it was a normal postpartum recovery. But I mean what is normal anyway? Just a setting on the dryer? 🤷🏻‍♀️😁 Each pregnancy and birth is different. You know each birthing persons situation, body and mind set towards recovery is different. Depending on how they recover and the time they put into it. Resting is key, you know. Taking that time and space to allow your body to fully heal. The benefit here is in my case all my kids at home after the birth were not babies. They were half grown and didn’t need my 24/7 attention. This allowed me time to rest and recover. To give my body the space it needed to physically heal. But as far as recovery goes it was pretty basic C-section recovery. 😬😉💜